their own countdown

Everyone has their own countdown...that is what I think. Don't we all have an event that we are looking forward to? For some it is a birthday - for another it might be graduation or a ball - it might be a person visiting (!!!!) or the next dance competition - it might be Christmas.... or it might simply be the next day since today has been a hard one.....

Who knows.

I want you to tell me about your countdown. What is it and how long until then?

One of my countdowns is the arrival of a dear friend from Oregon: Carina Austin. She will arrive in 44 days. I am so glad that I get a visit not only from a dear American friend but also from one of my dearest ones. So I am counting down 44 days now.

I am also looking forward to my birthday to be 34 years old which will be in 33 days. I am a birthday person and so I love to celebrate it and make that day special since it IS special :)

Thirdly, I am looking forward to that day when my mom will be in surgery for her right shoulder. I am looking forward to it because it is loooong overdue and I am glad she is doing it and that is in 12 days.

There are more countdowns as I am thinking about it now....but first I would love ot hear about some of yours!!

Counting down.......

Struggle in me

Spring and a part of summer is here and I really really like it. It is the time to have walks on the beach. I had one of Sunday late afternoon and I loved it so much. The place where I can instantly enter into worship  to the Creator God. I can instantly enter into a one on one time with Jesus. I am privileged to live in a place of uttermost beauty.

All that said, I do struggle quite a bit this time around...this season. I know how to get out of it. So it is not a struggle where I don't udnerstand God or HIS work in me. I do know.

I have not been able to have times with Jesus while reading in HIS word for a while. No regurlarity anymore and I can feel the difference in my life. I know how to get out of it and believe me, I don't write this to give myself a "religious punch". It is out of the yearning of my heart that I want to read more in God's word, not because I have to, not because it looks better if I did, not out of any of that.

Interesting enough...every time when I have had an extensive time in HIS word, HE refreshed me and HE let my soul exhale and rejoice.
I am in need of self-discipline to make it a regular time again to read in HIS word...to read continuously in HIS word.

SO this is the struggle I have. It is with myself, with my inner self.
 I battle the Kerstin that wants to sleep those 40 min longer in the morning instead of getting up.
 I battle the Kerstin, that is quiet happy to zap around the 4 different tv programs she has instead of spending time with Jesus.
I battle with the Kerstin that senses God's calling her and then forgets it a moment later.
I battle but I know that HE knows
I battle but HE is doing something in my heart.

I love HIS word
It is indeed alive and am on my way back to a regular time in this vibrant word!!!!

Falk, my Godson :)

I love my Godchild, my Godson's name is Falk and he will be 7 this year in December. I had lots of fun when I went to Germany recently. We played: I spy with my little eye and boy, Falk was pretty good hey :)
I love and miss this lill guy!

WOW

Every day I drive past this beauty of nature. Actually I cannot wait to have this bush in full blossoms again every year. Not is the time and I am driving past it so much. When I see it, my heart beats a bit faster and my soul just seems to open up and then a smile comes on my face. This picture does not do it justice.

The color (a mix of fuchsia and magenta) is so vibrant!!!!!!

Pachelbel - His canon and thoughts

Last week, Jesus put a very important, beautiful, refreshing and calming yet exciting piece of music on my heart. It is the canon in D by Pachelbel. The composer Johann Pachelbel was a German Baroque composer and this piece is his most favorite one. The Caonon, first published in 1919 and then rediscovered later is frequently played at weddings. I love this piece of music....always have but last week it started to fill my heart in a new way. I ofund myself humming the music again and again. Here is a link to youtube to listen to it yourself. A canon is a great composition of music. It has a leader (the main melody) and 1 or more followers ( these are the same ore close melodies that start after the leader and follow it). It sounds beautiful. Why would it be played at weeding? I find one simple answer: two melodies of one kind , one flowing the other, both in the same tact/beat and stroke. That is how I see a married couple. Now let me backtrack a few weeks when I was still in the States. Friends of mine have this wooden figure of a dancing couple

Whenver I looked at it, my heart would sigh. I love the way she nestles her head on his right chest and he takes up her left hand and puts it on the other checst. There is sweet intimacy displayed. I had to take the apicture of this. And when I look it now, I can here the canon being played in my head....no in my heart. I want to dance like this, not only with my king of kings Jesus, b with the man of God that HE has for me and I am waiting.

Bits and pieces

I finally remembered my password to be able to update my blog. For days I have been driving around with lots of ideas of what I can blog about next. Now as I am sitting here I forgot most of them. I have been back to the missionfield, back to South Africa for nearly 2 weeks now. My trip to the States and Gmernay has been a great one. I was so glad to see some friends and supporters and I really relaxed a lot. Likeweise, I met new people and enjoyed that as well. The hifhlight for me was to be with my parents for 7 days. My mom took time off at work and we had the whole 7 days to ourselves. And yes, surely that was not enough but I was so happy for that time. Needless to say that I miss them now more than before. Life being back is interesting. We are moving from spring to summer quickly, the wind is strong and I am really tired. I can sleep a lot. I have arrived somehow but am still arriving in ministry. Let me tell you of a wonderful thing that happened yesterday: I was asked to preach at an old age home. It is the one I used to go to every month with Pastor Xavier 2 years ago. It felt like coming home. Those dear people welcomed me with a traditional hug from every one :) I had felt thes tirring of the hOly Spirit to preach on weeds. Yes WEEDS. So I did. Jesus is the garnedner of the gardens of our heart. With HIM we can pull out every weed from the root. Jesus touched the people and it was great to be witness of HIS doing so. I guess it is part of being ready IN AND OUT of seasaon. I will again more about other things that fill my heart, otehr things that I observe here and otehr things that make me smile/laugh/or cry.