Yes, only 1 day until I will be flying back to Frankfurt to spend 5 weeks with my parents. I am so so excited. 
----one day, one day, one day :)
This last 2 days I have been extremely blessed. I am still processing the goodness that comes from God through people.

I am very grateful and full of thanksgiving


and I am preparing my body for a shock of temperature

new post

I know, this title is not very creative. May this have to do with the hour of me writing it? It is 3pm and my mind is a bit fried after meetings and work. I am about to go into my 5th genesis session with a woman and I am so eager to see what the Holy Spirit is doing next.
I have been pondering about what I can blog on and there is a series I want to start next week: Memorable Moments. I will pick moments that I experienced here in my life...right now I think it will be from the last  few years here in South Africa. "Should be fun!"
Do you want to join me and write about your memorable moments? Think about it.
Last night, I watched the Chronicles of Narnia (The lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe) again after a ling time. Oh how I love this movie. I never read teh books by C.S. Lewis though. I just loooove Aslan. They picked out such a beautiful tender male voice for him. As I watched, I actually made mental notes of teh scenes and a teaching that could go with it.
-like the enticement of Edmund by the evil white witch
-or when beaver tells the kids about the prophecy
oh there are so many great scenes it...such golden nuggets.

My favorite scene is when Aslan raises from death and he surprises Lucy and Susan, so so awesome. What is your favorite scene?

Multiplication

Multiplication is happening. I have had this on my heart for 3 years and it is so cool to see the beginning of it. Yesterday evening, my friend that I took through Genesis last year, started  her own Genesis group. I met with her last week to prepare her for the facilitation. She is ready and so eager.

Multiplication is happening.

2 thoughts: gold and trust

Hi everyone...or Hi to the one who actually still reads or follows my blog. I have not been really faithful to writing this year. I apologize. Today, I realized that I just have to MAKE the time and I will try to blog again for frequently. It will be a lot about impressions of my work here in South Africa, about thoughts and feelings and also about my walk with Jesus. Just as it has been.

Today I want to share 2 thoughts with you.

1) The first one takes me back to March of this year. I wrote in my journal that Jesus gave me a picture that morning. And here goes the picture..or scene for a lack of a better word:

I was sitting with Jesus and I had a pretty heavy heart. Jesus said to me: take your burdens and your fears and give them to me. Well, that was not a new concept to me and I gave Him my burdens and my fears. As I watched Him take them, they actually turn into golden balls in His hands and then I was so overwhelmed looking at HIS facial expressions. He seemed so careful with my burdens and fears. Unbelievable. Then Jesus said: My love, don't you know that even your fears and burdens are PRECIOUS to me? I have been meditating on that statement from my Lord this week. It is truly overwhelming but I am so thankful. From time to time, fears can overwhelm me and my heart is very heavy. I am so glad He reminded me this week of HIS love, HIS mercy and HIS favour over me. IN CHRIST I am the righteousness of God!

I did not want to make this blog post about me and yet I love to share what God is telling and how that actually changes something in my heart.

I have been on the mission field for 4 ½ years. This is my life and there are so so so many wonderful things about it. I hope I make a change in people's lives in touching them with Christ's love. And so often I battle with myself.

2. The second thought comes from my first year here in Cape Town. Jesus explained TRUST to me. See I love to make an acronym out of a word. So Jesus gave me the content to the word T.R.U.S.T. And here it goes: T. stands for TAKING A STEP back, R. stands for RESTING IN HIS PEACE, U. stands for UNDERSTANDING GOD'S POSITION AND MINE IN THIS, S. stands for STAYING AND MEDITATING ON THIS THOUGHT, and the final T. stands for TOTAL SURRENDER. Trust is a big issue and it comes back into my life again and again. Oh how little I trust God!

I am so glad that I can come to God with my burdens and fears...and I can come to HIM with my doubts. The battle is half won when I have identified what's wrong.

Dear friends, supporters and interrested,

I have been praying for a while about this trip and I am happy to say that I have the tickets for the trip. I will spend a special and significant amount of time with my parents over Christmas, New years & the whole of January (5 weeks).

The goal in Germany: to love on my parents, to care for my parents and also to see what God wants me to do to disciple them. That last point was part of God's challenge to me. My mom already asked me to read the Bible with her. I see that as a big part of my trip. It will be my mom's 60^th birthday on December 31^st. What a wonderful opportunity to be together!!!!! Likewise, I'll try to have some efficient time at my German Foursquare Church in Frankfurt.
Goal for Gresham (3 weeks): I was invited to be one of the bridesmaids for my friend Carina Austin. Then, I need to reconnect with donors. An important part of this trip needs to be some relaxing and peaceful time. I am praying about one more thing: I've been wanting to make usage of the Brainwave Optimization. This is Brain Mapping and Brain Training done at the Northwest Renewal Center in Gresham (www.nwrenewalcenter.com). It would be such a blessing to be able to do at least 5 sessions (incl.the training and mapping 1100 $). I have been suffering from bi-polar for 12 years and I came to understand that this brainwave program could be used by God in my healing process in a tremendous way. I would so love to be able to do this. I put this in God's hands.

For these next months, I don't dance and I don't go to the gym. I actually quit the gym to use the money for part of this trip. Dancing also contributed to costs. Thus I let it go for a few months until I come back.

Please give me feedback, let me know if you will be there at the time. I will have some gatherings planned and will tell you more as the time draws closer.

Be blessed today and may HE who put the stars in place bless you, set you free and guide you into all truth!

Kerstin, your Long Term Missionary in Cape Town/South Africa

Please pray and see if God puts it on your heart to support me especially for this trip.

The money needed for this trip has impacted my reserve fund. I do need to refill it with at least $ 1900. I already fundraised $ 250.

Every dollar would help me to come back to Gresham and bring stories, videos and pictures, to be with my parents over Christmas and my mom's 60^th birthday and it would help me to minister to my parents.

Let me know what you think!

Make checks out to East Hill Church, PO Box 650, Gresham OR 97030

memo line: Long Term Missions South Africa

Brainwave Optimization at NRC - wish/do

http://www.nwrenewalcenter.com/

As I am going over my list of things to do when I will be with my parents and when I will be in Gresham/Oregon again, there is one thing that is more on my wish list than on my to do list.
I have been wanting to do this for quite some time now.

When I came to Gresham in 2009, I heard the first time about the Brainwave Optimization. Through brain mapping and brain training, the brain can be positivly influenced and even behavioral structures can be altered. Back then I was too late to actually do it since you need to book in advance and I only had a small amount of time left to spend. When I came  back last year, I got more inforrmation on this. I am very interested since I have been struggling with bi-polar for over 12 years.
Brainwave Optimization is designed to balance brainwave frequencies through an advanced neurofeedback process. Dr. Ted Roberts, cofounder of Northwest Renewal Centre, writes about his personal experiences with taking these sessions: http://www.nwrenewalcenter.com/drted.htm


So now I know about it and it would be so great to be able to do it when I am going this time for 3 to Gresham for 3 weeks this coming Februray 2013.
I am praying about it and  let's see what what God has in store. I know that the sessions and the mapping cost money. However, I know that this money would be well invested.

1 mouth and 2 ears!!

In the book of James it says to be slow to anger and quick to listen. That means, slow to react and say something in anger than to shut my mouth and listen.

A wise man that I don't know the name of once said: "There is a reason why we have 1 mouth and 2 ears and 2 eyes". This means: rather lsiten and watch/observe more than speak.

I thought about this piece of advice this morning as I was praying over the day. It is true. I DO have 2 ears but do I actually use them as much as I use my mouth? I am thinking about my every day situations: at home with the neighbors - at the office with coworkers - then with friends.
It is a resfreshing thought, a refreshing piece of advice.

Dear Lord, help me today to speak less and listen more!


I have not blogged in quite a while. There have been so many times, where I had something on my mind to blog about but then I did not have the time nor the inspiration to blog.
I am now in the posession of my tickets and I started to plan. There are several things that are on my to do list. Let me tell you more about that in my next post. xoxo

I am coming in January/February 

I fly in around the 30^th January and plan to stay

until around the 19^th February - I am excited to be in my second home again.

The tickets including a time in Germany where I am able to spend Christmas

with my parents again after 5 years costs me around 1900 $.

My reserve fund would need to be refilled with this money.

I ask you humbly to consider donating to the Long term Missions account for South Africa

at East Hill to fill it up again.

ANY Donation would bless and help me go

back on the mission field in Cape Town

where God called me to be.

Any questions? kerstin.berthold77@gmail.com

Thank you in advance for praying about it!

I appreciate it lots 

Continuation

2 Saturdays ago, I went to Heartfelt. That was a women's meeting and over 500 women came to hear about the main topic of the morning: Friendship. I am glad that my friend invited me to come since this topic does not only interest but also bother me in certain ways.
As I mentioned in my previous post, I have experienced some rejection in that area as well as inadequacy. A big thing that I have learned over the years is to PACE myself in friendships. I can be pretty intense and overbearing which can poison a friendship from one side. I have been on both sides: I have poisend AND I was the one being poisened. NO FUN! NO GOOD! SOOOOOO distructive for a friendship.
My expectations just seem to be too high. Is there anyone who can relate remotely? I want to learn and become a better friend and I know every time God brings this up again, He is busy working in me. Here I am, Lord, use me, change me, make me.
During the course of time, I also learned to ask God if He could show me my friend's heart and its intention. That has helped a lot to love that friend the way she or he is.

" Lord please help me not to get stuck in this. Help me to get love like you love !"  

FRIENJECTURY: Friendship - Rejection - insecurity

I decided to call my post: FrienJectUry.

It has always been something that God has challenged me with. My heart is beating for friendship...looking for a good frienship and I am always challenged by God to be a better friend.

There are times I let God break me and my pride and then I see how far away I am from the friend I want to be to others. The issue of friendship is an area to grow continuously for me. It is an area where I can experience a lot of pain as I grow...

Because of insecurity and times of rejection my journey in the area of frienship has been a rocky one.It frustrates me when I see my insecurities. I want to be strong all the time. I know that that is not the reality and I am learning again and again, afresh and afresh how to be vulnerable and how to see myself in a weaker stage.

Feeling insecure is painful if I let myself feel it. I then see my shortcomings and am unable to receive God's grace for me. That in itself is frustrating. In this state, I start to compare myself with others and get easily jealous. That in turn hurts even more. Consequently, all this functions as an obstacle in my relationship with the Lord and in the race that God has me in...in my ministry.

Rejection is a powerful thing. I experienced times of rejection in friendships in my past. The wound of rejection can be such a deep one. It can start the process of feeling insecure. And this is how the circle closes:

Friendship- Rejection-Insecurity-Frienschip

FrienJectUry

"Dear Jesus, please help me and have mercy on me. I need your Grace, I need to receive your Grace. Lord, would you heal and then fill my wounds, would you help me not to feel insecure in any way? I don't have any reason to do so. Help me to live by your truth, YOUR reality and let me be a good friend to others, a friend that gives without agenda.

your Friend Kerstin"

-to be continued- 

sick for 10 days now!!!

Just an update. I have been sick for 10 days now - it is a tummy bug without throwing up (thank you Jesus). I have lost lots of fluids and have been feeling weak. I sweat easily. So I have been in bed or on the coach. It is getting better since yesterday but in baby baby baby steps. I might need to take antibiotics if it does not get better better soon. However I do dread anitbiotics because I know what impact it has on my system normally (it totally drags all energy out of me that I have left...so I don't wat to take them...only as a last resort).

My constant companion has been Romeo, giver of such love. I don't take it for granted and am tahnkful for that little snuggle ball

I rely on God and practice to TRUST HIM :)

A Tree of Righteousness – a Planting of the Lord

2 weeks ago, a lady died in our church. I was part of a team that went and had ministered to her previously because her husband had just died 3 weeks prior. She had told her daughter what she wanted me to have. I was honoured and humbled and too touched for words. How? I had only known her for 4 months? Among the things she wanted me to have was a tree.. like an ornament. Some of the street sellers here make them. They look really beautiful and I have been looking at them every once in a while.
Now I own one. It makes me thing of that lady that is with Jesus now. Here is a picture of it.

And this is what I am thinking when I look at :

I want to be a tree of righteousness, a planting of the Lord. I want to have strong roots and I want to bear good fruit . I want to be consistent and of strength that is not my own. As the tree takes the strength from the water in the ground, I want to take my strength from God and God alone.

I want to be known as a tree of righteousness, a planting of the Lord.

That is my prayer and that is what I think of when I my eyes rest on this tree that someone I barely knew gave to me before she died. WOW!