ShiningLight: Healing

BEYOND MEASURE

"OUR DEEPEST IS NOT THAT WE ARE INADEQUATE.
OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS THAT WE ARE POWERFUL BEYOND MEASURE. IT IS OUR LIGHT, NOT OUR DARKNESS, THAT MOST FRIGHTENS US.
WE ASK OURSELVES: WHO AM I TO BE BRILLIANT, GORGEOUS, TALENTED, FABULOUS? ACTUALLY, WHO ARE YOU NOT TO BE?
YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD. YOUR PLAYING SMALL DOES NOT SERVE THE WORLD.
THERE IS NOTHING ENLIGHTENED ABOUT SHRINKING SO THAT OTHER PEOPLE WON'T FEEL INSECURE AROUND YOU. WE ARE ALL MEANT TO SHINE, AS CHILDREN DO.
WE WERE BORN TO MAKE MANIFEST THE GLORY OF GOD IN US. IT'S NOT JUST SOME OF US. IT'S IN EVERYONE.
AND AS WE LET OUR LIGHT SHINE, WE UNCONSCIOUSLY GIVE OTHER PEOPLE PERMISSION TO DO THE SAME. AS WE ARE LIBERATED FROM OUR OWN FEAR, OUR PRESENCE AUTOMATICALLY LIBERATES OTHERS"

(Marianne Williamson - and quoted by Nelson Mandela 1994 at his inauguration!

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Healing

Healing time , this is my time, healing time, this is a process, healing time, this is what I need, healing time, my heart and soul cry out for that YET it is a hard time, it is a frustrating time, it is a difficult time and it is a hurting time.

God am I glad you are WITH me on this. I SO could not do it on my own. I see how I am driven by fears, one being fear of making a mistake, fear of messing up. It finds its big knot in my fear of feeling the phases of depression again that I used to feel so intensly a few years back. Depression should not own me or should not overpower me, but it does right now. Do you know what drives my train? The fear of hopefully never going back to those dark places. I survived every 3-month period somehow and boy have I thought of ending it there and then.so many times . I do not want to exist anymore, I want to LIVE! I WANT TO STRIVE and soar like a FREE eagle!!!!!! I do not want to go back to that depression and anxiety and hurt, Lord. YOu are showing me how much of my life is still run by this fear and I know I deserve more! Heal me Lord, sho me what to do, show me who I am and help me to put all this under my feet! So here i go, I put DEPRESSION under my feet, I am writing it on my left foot. I am more than a conqueror in my Christ and I put my hope in you God, I put my hope in you that you will take care of all that junk in me, all that that frustrates me...YOU ARE MY HOPE JESUS! Teach me, all you have, I am sold out for you God, sold out for what you have for me. I need you like the air that I breathe, I need you! Come Jesus ........